15 November 2006

Handing Out Ass-Kickings and Pop-Tarts...

And I'm fresh out of Pop-Tarts. Normally paralyzed by a combination of self-doubt, guilt and postmodern angst, I am currently surprisingly productive. Stuff whose ass I kick this week:

1) My minor field syllabus. Submitted in draft form yesterday. In keeping with my running cycle of spending every fall quarter for the past four years studying slavery (unintentional, but it just keeps happening, and once I start actually teaching U.S. history, it will probably keep happening for the rest of my professional life), I spent this quarter writing my own syllabus on slavery in the Atlantic world. Sure, it gave me nightmares (I probably need to stop engaging in sixteen-hour-straight work binges on topics like this), but it also reminded me every single second of how fucking fortunate I am. It was a little disturbing that I've reached the point where I watch videos on the Middle Passage with an eye to what they're leaving out, not to mention sipping my cup of sugary caffeine (irony!) while doing it, but it's one of those topics I always come back to studying. All things can be traced back to slavery, as far as I'm concerned. Capitalism? Slavery. Enlightenment philosophy and modernity? Slavery. Race? That's the more provocative chicken and egg question, but definitely modern notions of race. OK, I'm a little obsessed right now.

2) Preliminary dissertation proposal. Out of nowhere, I have a lot to say, and opinions likely to piss off many people. This is undoubtedly astonishing to most of you. Anyway -- I totally have a topic! And it's...not really even that different from my thesis topic! Just broader and allowing me to do lots more of my patented "law is crap" analysis. The people, I give them what they want. Plus I'll probably change it twenty times in the next year or two.

3) All LSAT students. You will shut up and listen. Especially the old-man ones who try to challenge my authority and make serious comments like "white men get screwed by the system!" (see #1, above) I have no patience for that crap.

4) Finally quitting a job that is sucking up too much time. As roomie said, "He wasn't terribly abusive, but you could do better." I am now shockingly left with enough time to actually do my comps reading. Part of me will miss putting on the standardized-test dominatrix persona several times a week, especially since it was a nice break from the kicked-puppy persona that is standard-issue to all grad students. But who am I kidding, I'll totally go back to him in the summer when I'm broke and desperate.

5) Algebra. My math students are always acting impressed at my "quick and dirty" version of math, even though I think they know might the "names" for the the legitimate versions of what I do. Initially I reacted with "crap, maybe I should be teaching them the 'real' stuff, except I don't know it" but this week I am temporarily convinced I have all the answers, so I am totally the boss of algebra right now. I crack my whip at you, quadratic equations!

Whose ass have you kicked lately?

5 comments:

A said...

I'm about to kick my one of my comps professor's ass with my reading list...yesterday he issued me & another student an email stating that we should keep our list for him "under control" to 25-30 books at the most.... Did he tell me to control myself?...does he not know that a) I have an axe to grind that requires mass amounts of knowledge to do it effectively and 2) that I'm undisciplined - ergo, "control" is a word I loathe. Watch out Prof. "control yourself"...your ass is about to be kicked off of my committee...but first I'm putting together a kick-ass reading list!

Rachel said...

I totally kicked butt at teaching English today. :) well, sort of. But I am convinced that teaching these kids English is going to improve my German SO fast. I have to be able to explain what I mean in German since they're beginners, so my poor sad speaking skills are going to have to improve - and quick! So I guess I really kicked my own butt today. :)

Congrats on being so productive! I feel like a lazy bum now. :)

kungfuramone said...

I am on the wrong side of the ass-kicking equation at the moment. But I'll get back to you when I hop the fence again.

Rachel said...

by the way, the pop tart thing made me laugh because we read an article written by Dave Barry about pop tarts that caused a house fire in one of my classes this week. Apparently, if Kellogg's pop tarts don't eject properly from the toaster, after 5 minutes and 55 seconds, they start shooting 2-3' flames into the air. How would you like to test this? :D

Dave Barry: what kind of toaster do you recommend for outdoor use?
Employee: a cheap one

Cabiria said...

Nice ass-kicking all around, people! And KFR, I am guessing your version of not having kicked ass recently is that you haven't yet finished polishing off the ass-kicking scheduled for eight weeks from now. You have ass-kickings in the bank, my friend.