07 January 2007

Where Would Jesus Crap?


Today's answer: on our lawn. This is a follow-up to a recent conversation regarding where Jesus would park. The answer to that was also, on our lawn. Our fundamentalist Christian neighbors have bible study at their house every single night of the week and have all their fundy friends park on our lawn for it. And now, they've taken to walking their dog right into the middle of our front yard for his daily business. We assume they hate us because they have never said a word to us, we decorate for Halloween, we have a sign on our door that says "Black Cat Commune," and there are three adults living together without any legal relationships to one another so this is obviously some sort of Satanic brothel of gay communist witches. But I still always thought, from my sketchy knowledge of the New Testament, that Jesus was not the kind of guy to park and crap all over other people's lawns. But then I don't have a close personal relationship with him like half the country apparently does. Whatever. It could be worse, we could have E. & R.'s neighbors.

3 comments:

kungfuramone said...

"some sort of Satanic brothel of gay communist witches"...ON DRUGS!

I mean, clearly.

Cabiria said...

Right! I totally forgot how we are constantly hanging with all the meth. And how we are also polyamorous baby eaters who molest goats before sacrificing them in our meth den. Actually, I don't think I should even give them that much credit for imagination. It's probably "they're going to hell" and that's the end of it.

Rachel said...

It's, "those poor, misguided, deluded souls... they don't even know they're headed for the fiery pit!" Sorry bout that - we used to have navy guys living on our street and they did the same thing when their friends were over. Dog crap and parking. One was drunk when he left one time and ran into our letterbox. Idiot. My current neighbors just yell at each other all times of the day, but especially at 1am.